Ergo, the woman is fully aware you are attracted to her and view her as a prospect purely because of how she looks – this is objectification as you have no idea whether you are compatible.

This. THIS RIGHT FUCKING HERE.

All my fucking life I’ve had people come on to me because “I’m their sexual fetish” (read: Asian). Many of them have actually come out and said that in those words thinking, somehow, that this was going to be flattering to me, not something that would instantly put my hand near one of my knives just in case.

Interact with people socially. Find shared interests. Do things together without the whole sex thing hanging between you. And you know what? If you come across right, you’ll get laid. Even if you’re not conventionally attractive.

If you come across as only being interested in me for my shape, my ethnicity, and where you can place which appendages in which receptacles, however, I don’t give a flying fuck how hot you look or not. You’re not getting anywhere near me. (I mean unless I’m cruising a pick-up joint, in which case being there is the signal that I’m available, duh.)