Obviously this is a broad and controversial topic (especially since I’m asking about both on and offline) but as individualism and isolationism seems to be increasing in the western world, I’m wondering what can be done and what others have done to counteract this trend.

Edit: Obviously, there’s broad things like participating in hobby groups or being nice to neighbours, but I’m especially interested in discussion of specifics, such as ways to set up these groups, organisational structures, or ways to expand connections from a hobby group beyond just the hobby.

  • AskewLord@piefed.socialEnglish
    41·
    9 days ago

    community won’t give you these things. there is no necessary connection between hanging out with people on the regular or doing stuff with people and that leading to deeper connections you may be seeking.

    if you think you can just kind of force this stuff to happen, you’re going to have a bad time. and frankly I think that’s the biggest issue, is people kinda force it to happen rather than let it happen and get mad.

    your deep relationships mostly form from unstructured time together, and spontaneous activity. that’s why a most people’s social life peaks in college, where you have large blocks of unstructured time. Also in spaces like college, the social distinctions you have with others blend away because you’re all operating in a relatively level of equality.

    hanging out with people 1-2 hours a week and doing a hobby structured and non-spontaneous and hence mostly leads to shallow relationships based solely around the activity. and there are a lot of underlying social differences that don’t come up in such an activity that once you step outside the bounds of it, become readily apparent.

    you don’t really get those in adulthood unless you’re on vacation or unemployed. or you are are regular at a bar every night…

    anyway, my rant is basically community and belonging aren’t a ‘problem to solve’, and if you think they are… well you’re not going to have a good time. it’s really whether or you you want to make the choice to give up your individual freedoms for the sake of group social approval.