I am from the US and went to England for school one year. In the lunch line here, if there is a choice, you ask for it and say thank you, like “Carrots and potatoes” then “thank you!”. But in England they said no, that is rude. It’s “carrots and potatoes, please.” Then “thank you” when you get them. Needed both just to be minimally polite.
I AM polite with my kids, I model it but don’t demand it really. They catch on fine. I have friends and relatives who made their kids “yes sir” and “yes ma’am” them. I don’t think that’s cool. I told my kids to ma’am and sir wait staff, cashiers and teachers but not family, it does seem almost cheeky, somehow, to be too polite with family.
Yes! Making your kids call you “ma’am/sir” is a huge red flag for me. They’re your children, not your staff. They’re your responsibility, not your home-grown ego-massagers.
It’s not really a thing in English but in my native language there’s an informal and formal way to say “you”. Once I was in a store, and somebody’s kid was being a little too loud/annoying for the parents liking, and she told her to be quiet using the formal “you”. It really irked me the wrong way, like you said it was like she was talking to an employee, but it felt even worse cause I’ve never used the formal you to my actual employer and vice versa
I am from the US and went to England for school one year. In the lunch line here, if there is a choice, you ask for it and say thank you, like “Carrots and potatoes” then “thank you!”. But in England they said no, that is rude. It’s “carrots and potatoes, please.” Then “thank you” when you get them. Needed both just to be minimally polite.
I AM polite with my kids, I model it but don’t demand it really. They catch on fine. I have friends and relatives who made their kids “yes sir” and “yes ma’am” them. I don’t think that’s cool. I told my kids to ma’am and sir wait staff, cashiers and teachers but not family, it does seem almost cheeky, somehow, to be too polite with family.
Yes! Making your kids call you “ma’am/sir” is a huge red flag for me. They’re your children, not your staff. They’re your responsibility, not your home-grown ego-massagers.
It’s not really a thing in English but in my native language there’s an informal and formal way to say “you”. Once I was in a store, and somebody’s kid was being a little too loud/annoying for the parents liking, and she told her to be quiet using the formal “you”. It really irked me the wrong way, like you said it was like she was talking to an employee, but it felt even worse cause I’ve never used the formal you to my actual employer and vice versa