Not to diagnose based on a few paragraphs, but you might want to read a bit about borderline personality disorder. I had a similar experience with my most recent ex, and to make a very long story far too short, I eventually felt like I couldn’t talk to them at all without upsetting them or doing something wrong. They were just so insecure and responded excessively to everything I did, no matter how innocuous, being around them was like trying to balance on a bicycle that wasn’t moving, emotionally speaking. I had to filter literally everything through how it would make them feel. I didn’t read up on BPD much at all until after we broke up (fucking hell it was a long messy one), but when I did so many things made more sense. I know that it wasn’t their fault, they have alexithymia (difficult for them to tell what they’re feeling) and have a lot of trauma from past emotional abuse, but it felt like they didn’t even realize how shitty they were being and didn’t make any effort to correct their behavior or show they were working on it at all. They were in therapy the whole time we were together and I’m pretty sure they just presented the most rosy curated “I’m the victim” version of events to their therapist, so it never seemed to really help anything.