I saw him down at the bus station screaming at a vending machine. I gave him a dollar.

What’s the reason they stated?

Can’t remember the last time I was in a Target. Or outside. Or even upstairs out of the basement.

This is what I would like to become if I donated my body to science. Realistically, however, I’d probably just end up being used by some military contractor to test shrapnel in an IED.

I think there was that brief period of interest when Trump turned the White House driveway into a car dealership ad for Elon. But yeah, you’re right. They’re all gas-fueled motorheads.

The portion of my family that voted for it.

Wait… How did he get rid of the negative symbol before his account balance? You can do that?

Nah, I don’t see a prune. I would have gone with dessicated blobfish.

It’s just one of those things you can do yourself, but you want the kid to feel valuable too.

Besides, if you’re getting radiation poisoning, you want that little shit to go down with you.