🌭 x 196

Cute lil’ Bobby Tables.

It might freeze up your computer.

Mine/mine!

Excuse me, I would like to make you aware that my food bowl is empty again.

When I walked in on a 17 year old kid and two of his older friends stomping on a homeless guy in a cocaine fuelled rampage. I almost had to stab the kid because he didn’t realize I already had my knife out… luckily one of his friends suddenly wasn’t in the mood to beat the shit out of me and stopped him.

they’re just jealous they don’t have anyone to step on their food :(

can i pet them though

really gently without making them think i’m squishing them

The combined energy of five separate universes courses through your body and you explode.

EMOTIONAL DAMAGE

with a hug.

Literally Jesus

I got surgery a while ago and am super happy with it. Though for me it was more of a “I hate having stuff on my face” kind of deal so it was a bit more urgent…

Potable water. Then I could grow a bunch of food for like, ever and my nuclear reactor will never overheat. Perfect.

Did the tiny face man actually engage in good faith arguments? Last time I watched I him (awhile ago) I feel like he just made me want to punch his tiny face.

woke mafia is everywhere

it’s a woke mafia conspiracy

If only conservatives weren’t so focused on the economy the economy would be doing better. :(