• riquisimo@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    10 days ago

    Last frame, what is that figure supposes to be?

    I know she’s thinking mama is neurospicy too, but it looks like “Is mama a quadraped?”

  • Brave Little Hitachi Wand@feddit.uk
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    9 days ago

    There’s really nothing like clocking an ADHD boomer parent who’s been masking for nearly seventy years and knows no actual facts about their own condition.

  • applebusch@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    9 days ago

    It’s pretty likely that the parents of neurospicy people are also neurospicy. ADHD and autism are both highly genetic, and these days many adults finally get diagnosed right after their kids do. I have both, and knowing what I know now it’s painfully obvious that both my parents are neurodivergent. My mom definitely has ADHD and likely also autism. My dad I’m pretty sure is just autistic. Neither of them will likely ever face the fact because they are determined to believe they are normal.

    • SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      9 days ago

      Meanwhile my Mum knows she’s not typical, but at 87 years old is past caring, lol … she just likes doing her sudoku and jigsaw puzzles, and watching Star Trek

  • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    9 days ago

    I made a whooole ass post about this a while ago, will copy pasta here:

    Yes I am the Train flavor of Autistic, and yes it is genetic

    My paternal grandpa was a mechanically/technically inclined person, a socially awkward, blunt and stubborn person with multiple failed marriages, and no friends … who turned to tobacco and alcohol to cope… and he literally did have an extensive, hand crafted model train set and environment, the size of two queen mattresses, that he built, and often neglected his kids to spend time on/with. That and the alcoholism also caused some serious familial neglect.

    My dad was a technically/mechanically inclined person, a socially awkward, very brash and overconfident, sutbborn person with a history of tumultuous romantic relationships, is still in a very unhappy marriage, no friends, who turned to alcohol to cope, which caused him to neglect his kids and wife… and then also went through various hobbies every 2-4 years or so, which became his whole personality untill he switched to another one.

    I can remember him one time, piss drunk, explaining to 10ish yearold me the ins and outs of structural concepts in aircraft design.

    I am also a technically/mechanically/computer programming inclined person, a socially awkward person with a history of tumultuous romantic relationships, who is overly literal and often quite blunt, with no real friends beyond the age of about 25… who would often isolate with the computer to get away from insane family drama… but at least I have not fallen into alcoholism nor had any marriages or kids, as I realize that social/traditional pressure alone is not a good reason to sign up for massive responsibilities…

    But nope! Ask any of my dad’s family if maybe Autism is a thing that runs in the male line of our family, and this is evidently a ludicrous, unfounded notion, but also at the same time there’s ‘just no real explanation’ for the astoundingly obvious pattern I have here described.

    They don’t disagree that the pattern isn’t there, they are all just massively biased/stigmatized against any concepts of mental illness or neurodiversity, choosing to view atypical, consistent behavioral patterns as simply indicative of the underlying, quality of moral character of a person.

    • Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world
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      9 days ago

      I’m pretty sure my dad is on the spectrum, as are 2 out of 3 of my siblings (as well as myself.) The one I don’t suspect of being on the spectrum is diagnosed ADHD. I know for a fact that my nephew, son of one of the ones I suspect, is autistic. This kid was a lot like me when he was little, my god. He couldn’t understand why he couldn’t just do things to help his little brother, and when I explained that there are some things people just have to learn on their own the hard way, he got sad and lamented about how upsetting that is. As someone who got kicked out of the Girl Scouts for “being bossy” because I regularly tried to help the other kids who struggled to do their crafts, I felt his pain immensely.

      He’s a teenager now, and last time I saw him I spent an hour driving with him and he would. not. stop. talking about the latest F-Zero. Oh wait, he did stop sometimes, to then go on about physics. I love him to bits and I’m glad to support his interests, but I was glad when we arrived at our destination. Is that how other people felt when I talked about astronomy as a kid? 😅

      His father, and my own father, both ramble on about topics despite other people lacking an interest. My dad will talk to you the same way whether you show signs of active listening or are clearly glued to the TV. He has a wicked intelligence for the natural world and enjoys camping alone. Meanwhile, my siblings and I all had our own special interests, with a shared penchant for creativity. One or more of us was always making some kind of project, from popsicle-stick roller coaster ramps, to cardstock Wheel of Fortune wheels that spun on K’nex pieces, to making dolls out of homemade clay, to designing our own board games. Growing up in a majority neuro-diverse household shorted us on some social skills, but damn did we create some cool things.

    • gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.deOP
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      9 days ago

      They don’t disagree that the pattern isn’t there, they are all just massively biased/stigmatized against any concepts of mental illness or neurodiversity, choosing to view atypical, consistent behavioral patterns as simply indicative of the underlying, quality of moral character of a person.

      i think for historical context you have to understand that a hundred years ago people were literally put into prison (“mental asylum”) for being “mentally ill” and they were never seen again.

      that stuff scares people. science (“science”) has done incredible harm to a lot of people in the name of “curing” them. they didn’t just give electroshocks to “mad” people or sterilize the gays (btw, what’s that for if they already don’t make children!?!) but many of the “mental hospitals” were outright torture chambers, intending to scare the large masses of population into “correct” behavior.

      people have these horror stories passed down for generations, it’s grave stuff and people don’t forget that even if they don’t speak about it consciously. that’s why it is so difficult to remove that stigma around “mentally ill” people because deep down people are still scared about how they’d be treated if they were declared as such. that’s why there’s so many people just insisting that they’re mentally well, even when it’s gravely obvious that they are not.

      • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        8 days ago

        And yet they have no problem deciding that I have all kinds of other mental conditions, and try to put me into a mental ward.

        I’d been seeing a therapist for years, they say hey you’re probably autistic, lets try to get you an adult autism specialist… I tell my family this, show them the appointment notes from my therapist, the referral…

        And they say that I am delusional, hallucinating, and need to be committed.

        Mind you, at that point in time I was making more money than anyone else in my family, working a database admin / sql analyst / functionally co-lead of the entire internal tech department job.

        But according to them…

        ( mom has crippling OCD and a literally novel form of neuropathy, is about as mentally capable as an 8 year old … dad is alcoholic, and also an insane MAGA cultist, and is thus literally a paranoid delusional narcissist, who also builds ghost guns in his garage… brother fried his brain at raves a decade ago and with molly and e and god knows what else, is a constant nervous wreck, had been diagnosed with literally more disorders than I csn remember, mostly likely actual correct diagnosis is BPD )

        … I am hallucinating and having paranoid delusions, because they can’t read?

        So obviously I don’t talk to them anymore.

        I get what you are saying in terms of there being a general stigma, but my family had no problem weaponizing that against me, so I don’t think they’re due any … benefit of sympathy due to being misinformed, when they’re actively using their delusional levels of ignorance to ruin my life.

        • gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.deOP
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          4 days ago

          i’m really sorry, hearing your situation makes it sound quite difficult. the world should be a better place but what can we do to make it one?

          • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            4 days ago

            My ideas don’t matter, no one ever has nor ever will listend to them.

            Why don’t you come up with some ideas?

            I did that for 25 years and despite me being correct ~90% of the time, I just got called insane.

            I’m done.

            I don’t care.

            I can probably surivive the currently occuring 2nd Great Depression, and subsequent cyberpunk dystopia.

            Unless you wanna murder everyone in the world with a net worth over roughly 1/4 billion dollars, iy doesn’t matter what you or I think.

            • gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.deOP
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              4 days ago

              well i get your point that people are stupid and unreasonable, but i learned to look at it like that:

              most people are experimental physicists and just need to try things out no matter how stupid these things are, because only from the experimental outcome will people learn. so it’s not for nothing; it just takes a frustratingly long time for things to change.

              • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                2 days ago

                What I’ve learned is that by far, most people do not change, they just become more of what they already are.

                Only the curious and honest, or sometimes the seriously traumatized who are actually capable of deep introspection, only they change.