A cleaned-up quote from comedian Eddie Griffin…

“Have you 🤬 seen this 🤬 First 🤬 Lady?! 🤬gotta “perfect record”. Don’t tell me that this ain’t KGB’s most successful spy m🤬f🤬 to-date. Look at her eyes 🤬 got that fifty yard stare! Ni🤬, don’t know where the body’s buried. 🤬🤬🤬 knows where ALL the 🤬 bodies are buried. 🤬And that white n🤬 married her.”

“Yes, officer. I am her lawyer. I need to give her these papers and this hand-drawn map describing her legal exit strategy.”

𝕒 𝕗𝕖𝕨 𝕙𝕠𝕦𝕣𝕤 𝕝𝕒𝕥𝕖𝕣…

Sydney Bristow lives rent-free in my head. We both use the same bank branch, the same grocery store lane, visit the same yogurt hut, enjoy ube ice-cream straight outta the carton. And discover we have the same hobby of expensive tactical flashlights.

Horray! Another Wonderfalls fan!

–jim benton shots comics

Hummingbird phobia.

I wonder how many intended to live fast and die hard, only to find out they were vampires. And now they have to live forever.

Opps. Poor choice of wordplay. 🥴

Explanation… an old pre-2000 USDA sticker placed on by grocery stores to indicate “this is a 100% certified meat product”.

My twist… this photoshop is a 100% human-made product.

Excellent photoshopping.

deleted by creator

I just had an awful thought. What if we reach the next ai generating chapter where its programmed to make “freshly photoshopped” images; and getting better and better.
Oh gawd… are those clipping boundaries… too perfect??

I went down a brief rabbit hole on the zip+4 and the IMb (intelligent mailer barcode). The +4 was originally a local division inside a single zipcode, like a neighborhood or mail route. +4 and the barcode was then called POSTNET – decommissioned and now upgraded barcode encoding to IMb, which can contain like 2000 bits of data. The zip +4 technically now has a length of 11 digits, and is inside a IMb barcode.

Conclusion, barcodes have sensitive data too. ~✍️

edit add: i wanted to see if my phone’s barcode app could scan too see if OP’s post office really calls him Mr. Off, but it cant natively read mailer codes and I fell asleep and the rabbit hole ended.

What’s currently inside Microsoft Outlook these days? I have not used Outlook as an email client since the Win98 days. I’m guessing Artemis crew is using a calendar or synced tasks feature of some kind.

Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in 3 moves.

edit to add: RIP to the characters and legend he portrayed. Acknowledging the person in real life was a bad egg.