What are the sausages made of?
The ones who won’t wear clothes.
All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.
I cannot condone murdering and eating nudists.
Can you think of anything more demeaning than being ground up and stuffed inside your own intestines.
Consider the chicken omelette.
chicken chorizo omelette
like i think there is an actual prohibition in the bible based on this idea. eating milk and meat from the same cow at the same time was/is a sin per… it sounds like leviticus to me but i’m going to be lazy and pretend i actually know what i’m talking about.
Do not eat a kid in its mother’s milk, yeah
thanks! i knew i had it close but y’know, it’s not my religion it’s not that important that i have it right in my day to day. i knew one of my internet buddies would have the correct idea
It’s these little joys that make this job so satisfying.
The unemployed.
We don’t talk about that. Would you like a slice?
probably tofu?
i say you can still taste the muppet
There’s a book out there called Bullshit Jobs.
The thesis is that most jobs are bullshit, that they add nothing to society except to entertain middle management who, in turn, entertain upper management. My last job was a bullshit job but the position was never eliminated because the funding was already secured and to eliminate it would be a political blow to the director.
Oddly enough, menial, low paying jobs are often the ones that are NOT bullshit jobs, but as you climb the education and career ladder, you are more and more likely to find yourself in a bullshit job, a sinecure for those who followed all the rules of the ruling class.
Someone else noted that if a minimum wage worker takes five minutes extra on their lunch break they are likely to get reprimanded, if not fired.
If the Vice-President leaves for lunch at 10 am and doesn’t come back at all nobody raises an eyebrow.
Capitalism is more than an economic system, it’s a system to manage existential anxiety, ie, a religion:
People who are rich have access to a lot of distraction, so they don´t have to work.
I really like the Apple TV show “Your Friends and Neighbors.”
One of the tropes of the show is that the protagonist can rob from people in his fancy neighborhood and very often no one notices that they’ve been burgled because they have so much stuff that missing a $500,000.00 watch doesn’t even register with them.
Yes, it’s purpose was likely achieved when it was purchased. Shopping is the hobby.
Another story, maybe illustrating how having too much money can backfire: Mark Zuckerberg decided to start collecting watches. He immediately just bought the most valued watches in existence. How much fun could that possibly have been?
I live in NYC. I’ve gone to charity thrift shops and picked up brand new items that people donated.
It used to be more fun before thrift stores started taking advantage of online sales; it definitely used to be worth a trip to the rich part of the state to hit the thrift stores.
Eh.
During World War II, secrecy required some jobs to be performed where workers didn’t understand the context of what they were doing. For instance, a worker would wave a wand over a set of clothes. If the wand beeped, the clothes went into one pile. If the wand didn’t beep, the clothes went into a different pile. The worker was checking to see if the clothes were irradiated, but they weren’t able to know the context on why they were waiving wands over clothes.
I suspect that a lot of jobs are at that level of abstraction. There may be value in those jobs, but the affects of the job not getting done aren’t immediate and it takes a higher level understanding of the work flow to understand why that job is necessary.
I love that your counter-example is also just casually a violation of workplace safety and employee consent.
oh yeah, being able to say “i directly supervised a team of 9” is different HRspeak from “i directly supervised a team of 10”. I can’t remember exactly what X and X+1 were back when i practiced, but one meant quarterly tax filings and one meant monthly. I’m sure there are other areas (i started in bookkeeping and payroll and when i got supervisees the very first thing i delegated was (all our easy clients’) payroll. i fucking hate doing payroll) but when all you got is a hammer
Children’s cartoon counts?
Mommy Pig writes a book though, I write emails, teams messages and Schrödinger’s scripts that break when observed
Phew, I am safe.
Cannibalism.
I owned chickens once, and yes they’re all one good peck away from full cannibalism. They will go after each other and their own eggs. It doesn’t matter. The second they figure out that other chickens and eggs are made of food, they go wild.
Thankfully it’s only ever one or two at a time that figure this out, and those ones can be separated or culled as necessary.
so like the entire damn flock descended on one of my cool brother’s chickens and ate it in seconds because, the way he told it, it had been looking sad for a few days. not like sad like mange, sad like emotionally.
they never did that again but like, my brother also started eating more chicken.s
I can’t really see a pig dressing up to write code for cancer research. Maybe that’s why the NIH has had funding cut
Lab coat, pocket protector, short sleeved plaid shirt, boom
(It’s the same for any non specialized science job)
I wish we got lab coats. Those lucky mfs in wet lab get all the cool stuff
Big Science doesn’t want you to know this, but You can just buy lab coats!
You don’t need a degree or anything, they just hand them out for money!
If dress code permits, I’d absolutely buy my own and wear it. If anyone complains, tell them we’re doing research, and all sciences deserve lab coats!
Hannibal Lecter but he has to work a day job.
How did I know it would be Richard Scarry? Or someone with a very similar style, but I’m pretty sure it’s him.
picture unrelated
also: yesssss i have a saxomophone i pass the Pig In Garments Socialutility Test
… I could picture plenty of fake jobs depicted like that
