Ah misandrist memes, just what I needed to cheer myself up.
Next I’ll stop by instagram to see misogynist memes to get my full course.
my favorite part, is it’s never that the author of the meme is the one who just… picks shitty people. It’s always the fault of the entire gender, clearly.
I’ve met plenty of shitty women, men, and trans folks. and plenty of great ones. It’s almost as if being a shitty friend/partner has nothing to do with someone’s sex or gender, and it’s about their actions as an individual person. and frankly, if someone is shitty to you it’s your job to end the relationship, not to continue with it and expect them to be better than they have demonstrated themselves to be. whenever my exes did shitty things, it was over and I’m glad for that because now I don’t have a shitty partner that I married to and full of resentment and frustration that they refuse to take take on their fair share of adult responsibilities, who also resents me for not doing more for them while I was already doing 150%.
and almost like blaming the entire other gender is the point, because it absolves you of the responsibility of your own choices or worse, the blame of your unspoken expectations.
The bottom panel is absolutely correct, except for the “never get married” bit. Just that chapter is wild. Not for the faint of heart but can recommend.
My husband was a champ. He worked full-time and also stayed up at night manually pumping my breast milk while I was sleeping, and he’d wake up with th baby & fed the baby & changed diapers & he cooked meals too! The only thing he didn’t do is clean and that’s okay cuz I loved cleaning.
I always wonder what kind of point one wishes to make and what kind of responds they expect.
with this post?
it’s rage bait. they want to get engagement by playing into grievance stereotypes. and people are happy to respond with either their bias confirmation or their counter-argument.
it’s trolling, essentially.
Seems like a lot of trouble could be avoided if people who don’t actually want to take on the responsibilities of parenting stop reproducing.
Not a lot of people understand what parenting is going to be like before they have kids.
It might help if society was more honest about it. For starters, everyone could cut the shit with gaslighting people who say that they aren’t interesting in becoming parents. It’s a huge disservice to everyone involved.
The meme isn’t judging all men, people. It’s calling out a specific behavior and attitude. Not sure why people are so upset. Unless you actually do this, of course.
My wife is in labor as we speak! Crazy how I’m sitting here this meme feels very reIevant. I aspire to not be this guy.
And still it might happen that the outcome on her side is the same.
Post partum depression is super common, same as self-image issues, body issues and so on. Also, even if you do everything right as a husband, she’s still not going to get a ton of sleep, especially if she breast feeds.
OP is an idiot for treating sex as just transactional.
And you’re doom scrolling rather than helping?! Get back to it, slacker!
Congrats, though 😁
Eh it’s a long process and not much going on now :-/
Bullshit. This is stupid, generalising and damaging in just the same way as memes about how women get married and stop having sex.
Those stupid sexist memes are also not about all women.
I dunno, my ex was ok with the kids, and I was able to sleep & nurse at the same time (small boobs) but breastfeeding knocked my libido down to less than zero. Usually I run pretty hot, but while nursing it was like I couldn’t care at all about sex, it felt like a chore, and when we did, I had both fear (because childbirth) and had to work just to get to a baseline level of desire at all. I always figured it was a natural birth control thing, nature helping so kids don’t come too close together.
“She wanted a divorce out of nowhere!” - Every deadbeat dad.
This is some boomer shit
Specifically American boomer, and something that’s still going on. There was a thread here on lemmy a while ago that was about how american culture is very different from much of the world in terms of how much the father does in the things mentioned here. That a lot of the world have had it kinda even for many decades and some places even centuries.
“I hate my bitch wife” is peak American boomer humor.
Its not. That is what people tell themselves to feel better.
I dont think that is true tbh dads nowadays take care of babies as much as moms even after doing job and everything
There’s still a huge gap. Men do more, but still not as much as women.
If you’re ‘doing a job and everything’ then there’s an entire workday’s difference to begin with…
Sure, both parents should be given leave until the child is 1,5 years old. But until that becomes possible, someone has to work.
Are you implying that the workday doesn’t count for anything? Someone’s gotta bring home the bacon.
When I was in the office, I’d be there for 8 hours, then get home and take over, then also work at night with the baby monitor on. My ex-wife only really had to take care of the baby that 8 hours a day, I handled most of the other 16. Of course she complained that I wasn’t doing anything. So after that I started working from home for my main job as well. After that she only really had to take care of the kids (one mine, one not) for the 3-4 hours a day that I got to sleep.
No. I’m saying that the working partner has a significant gap purely because they are working, so it’s pretty spurious to claim you"re “caring equally”.
Personally I actually cared significantly more on top of being the one who had to work a full-time job and side gigs, but my ex is a unique kind of piece of shit and I’m not trying to insinuate that this is a common experience.
But your original comment sounded like something my ex would say when she still allowed me to go to the office. “Oh you get to take a break for 8 hours.” No I don’t, that’s still work, it’s still very taxing mentally. If you work for 8 hours and then come home to take care of the children for the rest of the evening so your partner can have a break, there’s only one person actually getting a real break. Of course if you come home and drop yourself onto the couch and expect dinner to happen, then it changes who the person getting a break is, but IMO that’s not as common among young families these days, compared to a few decades ago.
You’re srill ascribing your ex a bit here i think. I know what employment is like, i’ve been treadmilling the rat race for nearly 40 years. Why do you feel the need to explain how mentally taxing it can be to another grown adult?
I never said work was a break, or intimated as such - simply stated that a work shift would remove the working partner from childcare for the period of the work day.
I dont think that is true tbh dads nowadays take care of babies as much as moms even after doing job and everything
If you’re ‘doing a job and everything’ then there’s an entire workday’s difference to begin with…
In the context of this thread, you’re very clearly saying that the mom is always doing more because the workday is a vacation for the dad.
If that’s not what you meant, maybe rephrase your comment, because that’s what it reads like and judging by the 10 downvotes (none of which was me), I’m not the only one seeing it that way.
Because ultimately the meme was about moms not getting a break, and if the dad works all day and then goes and takes over the responsibilities at home for the rest of the day, then the mom is the only one ACTUALLY getting a break on any given weekday. And that’s what most, though not all, young fathers seem to be doing these days. Maybe not in your corner of the world or when you were young, but as far as I can see, that’s how it is these days.
Do you expect mothers to care for a baby all day and all night then?
Since you’re suggesting that sharing night duties gives mom a break that dads don’t have.
Should fathers never have to take care of anything when they get home from work?
Again, you’re adding the definition of “vacation” to the work day.
I never did that. That’s something you’re inventing when I point out a work days hole in childcare.
(Also i’ve personally been using gender neutral language. Op referred to working dads, but my points extend to any variant of the dynamic across any partnerships where one works ad the other doesn’t)
Downvotes on a thread like this mean nothing, btw - they’re absolute nip to the redpilled trolls.
Wat…
Must be America again, because I’ve hardly seen this in Denmark, Sweden, Germany, the Netherlands, France, or Spain (all countries I’ve either visited for extended periods of time, or lived in for portions of my life).
In my own family, however, I am the biggest brother, so they basically made me take care of a lot of the dirty tasks involving my siblings.
I’m Danish and can confirm. I grew up in a family full of babies and all the dads were always super involved. All the friends I have, who have little ones, the dads are involved. Only one of them has a situation where the mom is mostly on baby duty, but that’s because dad has a job that requires him to travel for work for months at the time. When he’s home, he’s very much a hands on dad. Men love being dads. At least where I live.
The only times I hear about hands off dads is when it’s America and Middle Eastern countries.
When my daughter was born, my wife and I would take turns caring for her through the night. She pumped breast milk so I had access to food as needed on my nights, and she could breastfeed directly on her nights.
It soon became clear that our daughter preferred direct breastfeeding to the bottle, but I was much better at calming her and getting her back to sleep. The result was that I ended up covering my wife’s nights more frequently because she was otherwise at home with the baby all day while I was at work and felt like she needed the break. I was also “used” to sleep deprivation from the past years when I was working full-time while also going to college full-time, and she would stay home and watch TV, read, or paint.
I was constantly exhausted for the first 6 months, until she was mostly able to sleep through most nights. I would regularly apologize to my coworkers for my reduced cognitive ability because I didn’t get any sleep the previous night or two, and my boss would express how he didn’t understand how I was still vertical. Thankfully they were all very understanding and accommodating, and I was at least still able to get most of my work done to our standard of quality, albeit much more slowly than usual.
I didn’t have time, opportunity, or energy to even consider the prospect of intimacy at that time, so I absolutely sympathize with new mothers with absentee partners that have normal levels of energy and libido.
This is why both parents should get parental leave. I just took care of all the nights and slept through half the day while my partner handled those hours. Neither of us had to deal with sleep deprivation.
The number one way (more effective than medication) to increase a woman’s libido is an extra hour of sleep. It’s truly no wonder that getting negative hours of sleep for a literal year at least kills libido.
I’m pregnant and the insomnia is killing me. 4 or 5 hours a night, usually. And the poor sleep will only continue when the child is born. Everyone’s talking about how men need to help more with chores and all that’s true and good that you need division of labor, but even if you’re good at division, the sleep loss with children is inevitable.
Y’all get 5 hrs of sleep a night every night??
Crazy
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The fun part is when you are involved and it still happens
Weird choice to air your marital issues on a post that’s clearly about labour division but hey, you do you
Oh no you put the “nice” coins into your wife and she didn’t give you sex like a vending machine??
You need therapy, and probably to get out of the basement and interact with people outside
Nah I divorced a man like you guys in here who didn’t feel the need to lift a finger after coming home from work. Or worse - not do much and still complain about doing everything while trying to get your dick wet between the baby crying.
It’s totally crazy how women need time to heal after birth, right guys? Huh huh huh but she won’t fuck me QQ
You need some therapy. You divorced his dumb ass and you clearly have strong feelings about it still. Trauma is valid, but taking it out on an entire gender isn’t.
The entire point of this sub thread is “this still sometimes happens to guys who aren’t massive piles of shit”, and all of your responses amount to “No, you are all piles of shit! Only piles of shit ever feel this way, so by definition you’re a pile of shit!”
It’s some really disgusting circular logic. There are horrible assholes out there like you say. There’s way too many of them. But you keep making massive assumptions about the commenters here with no evidence whatsoever, then burning the assumptions at the stake as truth.
Just give it a rest. I’m truly sorry your ex was terrible, and it sounds like divorce was letting him off easy.
The entire point of this sub thread is “this still sometimes happens to guys who aren’t massive piles of shit”
The prevailing belief in here that women don’t want sex themselves and that they are the arbiters of who gets or deserves sex is inherently sexist to begin with - there are so many reasons why someone’s libido may tank (men and women) and to cry about not getting your dick wet because you changed some diapers is tone deaf.
The first couple of years with children are intense. Kindness and empathy and communication will get you much farther in a relationship than letting resentment build. On both sides.
It can take years for women to fully heal and feel back to semi-normal in their bodies. Yeah, I’m going to side eye men that think their wife should be back to banging every day after a couple of months.
It doesn’t sound like you were actually involved.
Or you don’t understand what the mother’s body goes through.
We’ve got men in here confused as to why women get more time off after giving birth.
Probably pissed that they also don’t get a “vacation.”
Well atp, it’s just genetics and hormones, which isn’t really her fault either lol
It isn’t me, it’s mah ATP and hormones!!!
Long as it’s still the man’s fault for desiring intimacy, am I right or am I right ladies?
The assumption that it’s always a neglectful husband causing marital issues is incredibly demoralizing, especially when the response to “but what if it isn’t a neglectful husband” is this sort of thing. Just more reasons why the man is the one being unreasonable.
Look, no man is “owed” their wife’s affections or physical intimacy. But it is often an important piece of an adult romantic relationship, and it’s not unreasonable for a member of that relationship to have some feelings about things changing over time, or suddenly for that matter.
The fault isn’t with desiring intimacy. Do you think women never desire intimacy? Do you think married women who have brought life into the world never want intimacy?
Men also can’t expect their wives to be open and available for sex if there isn’t a certain level of respect. Not being involved with child rearing and the house is showing his wife that he doesn’t care to help. That he doesn’t care enough about HER to be willing to help. THAT is usually a key part in not feeling loved and in turn killing the intimacy.
Please reread the chain of comments. This is specifically about situations where there is respect, involvement with child rearing, and with household running/chores/etc.
But that’s impossible because men bad and women perfect and always the victim.
Women bad because she won’t give me sex boo hoo
“Physical intimacy is only sex nothing else, and men who want physical intimacy in an intimate relationship are the problem.”
- You.
Holy fuck, this thread is a circle jerk of “God, I know her vagina was stitched shut and she cant get enough calories but, damn it, I wanna fuck after she rocks the kid to sleep.”
It isn’t her fucking feelings you divorce demanding loser.
That is a complete and total strawman. No one has said anything about such clearly unreasonable shit like wanting sex immediately after a newborn, or while the woman is recovering/post-partum/etc.
How is anyone supposed to have a calm and respectful conversation about this stuff when the moment you even brush up against it slightly, the “men are all horrible awful pigs and it’s all their fault” brigade comes out in full force?
I’m sorry so very many people have encountered so many god awful men as they have. I am, as best as I can, doing what I can to not be one of them.
And there are still intimacy issues in my relationship. Am I not allowed to talk about this because so many men have been awful that it’s just verboten? Fuck everything about that.
I don’t think some of you incels are actually married.
I have multiple friends that nearly died, were hospitalized, etc. My wife went anemic and suffered a number of other ailments. Hell, not even carrying but the act of breastfeeding requires a metric fuckton of calories.
I will never know what women go through because I’m not one of them.
You seem proud to carry the baton of permanently knowing even less.
Have a pleasant morning.
I don’t think you know me at all, and you need to stop attacking shadows.
Is that enough evidence for you? My hand with my wedding ring, a few of my daughter’s toes at the top, and an old school style hand written timestamped note.
My two year old daughter has been having awful allergies since last night, when I slept on the floor in her room so I could comfort her when she kept waking up coughing throughout the night despite having doctor approved antihistamines, some “all natural”/home remedy cough syrup, and an albuterol rescue inhaler. I used the snot sucker, warm water to help cut the mucus, kept her propped up to help with breathing and mucus drainage. My wife got a full night of rest. No baby monitor, no interruptions.
This morning I’m also solo for around four and a half hours while my wife goes and does a weekly thing that helps keep her real passion (that she can’t do for a living unfortunately) alive.
I’m not looking for an award for doing the husband and father thing. I’m not expecting anything from her for this, and I’m not expecting anything from the internet or the comment section at large. I don’t need fucking “good boy points”.
What I need is for chucklefucks like you to just fucking stop. Stop telling every man with issues in their relationship that it is always without a doubt their fault. That they clearly don’t understand. That they’re having unreasonable expectations. That there is absolutely 0% chance they’re anything but wrong. Just take a step back and leave room for not even bare minimum understanding or sympathy, but just keeping your damn mouth shut if all you have is throwing shade.
Long as we’re throwing the “I’m actually a better more understanding husband than you and you don’t understand childbirth” shit around, let me slap my metaphorical cock on the table.
My wife hemorrhaged two thirds of the blood in her body during childbirth. The first moments of holding my child were struck through with concern that I was losing my wife. The nurses had the god damn crash cart ready.
Your insight into the birthing process is not unique.
I’ll say it again. This entire subthread has been born from the condition “what if the man wasn’t a shitpile”, and 90% of the responses have been bunch of people incapable of accepting that as a possibility, building strawmen, and then don quixote-ing themselves into a sense of moral superiority. Just fucking stop.
One guy to another, your hands look soft. What type of lotion do you use?
Stop telling every man with issues in their relationship that it is always without a doubt their fault. That they clearly don’t understand. That they’re having unreasonable expectations.
Holy shit, I just connected the dots here.
You don’t get enough sex cuz your wife is healing, and you’re essentially unloading the baggage on her?
Honestly I have zero knowledge of whether or not your wife is a problem in a relationship. I can tell just by listening to you that you are a sizable problem in your own relationship and have no idea.
The truth is that in the 50 years I’ve walked this God forsaken planet I’ve never once sat back to think about the injustice is committed against me as a man, or the perceptions against me. Frankly they don’t materialize in my daily life because I’m not a piece of shit. I don’t ever sit down and worry about whether or not people think I’m an ideal man or not.
Get a strange that you’re so awful and simultaneously so sensitive about it.
Well I don’t know if that’s worse: you being an incel or not. Minimally you sound emotionally abusive if your biggest concern about your postpartum wife is not her well-being and is more geared towards whether or not she’s serving up that delicious pussy.
My wife hemorrhaged two thirds of the blood in her body during childbirth. The first moments of holding my child were struck through with concern that I was losing my wife. The nurses had the god damn crash cart ready.
Never mind. If you’re admitting that you’re one of the worst human beings imaginable, kudos to you.
And I’ll go straight home and fuck my wife thank you. Despite your beautiful handwriting and eloquence, I have better things to do and would rather please her.
Note the last couple of words.
Oh my God you seem like the kind of person that needs grok to explain posts to you because you’re so utterly incapable of basic reading comprehension
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Legit question: How long do you think postpartum goes for?
It’s telling that you were downvoted for asking this.
So much willful ignorance in this thread. It’s disgusting.
I would say about two or three months, based on what I know from my mom. But she also has an inherent issue with her hips, which could extend that period beyond the norm.
For the record, it can take up to 1-2 years to feel back.
It’s much longer than that and also varies woman to woman.
It’s really gross in here.
Is it so shocking that there are many different reasons that a woman may not want sex as often after having a baby?
Men in here acting like women are punishing them by withholding sex ffs.
None of that is true, some guy mentioned his frustration about it and you freaks dogpiled him accusing him of being some unreasonable borderline rapist with ZERO reason to believe so, other than gender.
You’re being absurdly misandrist and completely harming whatever point you think you’re making by just being rude and accusatory, then acting like the victim when that attitude is unwanted. It’s frankly disgusting and is the kind of behavior that helps fuel the young and impressionable boys lurch towards people like Tate.
Women have bodily autonomy. Sorry that deflates you. And a woman post-pardum? Fuck the hell off.
She doesn’t need to:
- Fuck you
- Clean your house
- Make you a sandwich
- Or virtually anything else just because you demand it.
No one is dogpiling. It is a shitty sentiment, by a shitty person (like you).
And then downvote the living shit out of them because “damn it, your job is to get me laid!”
Its definitely not always the mans fault but we would do well to understand that men don’t have the same needs when it comes to maintaining a long term sexual relationship.
Women generally need to feel a sense of emotional security, trust and connection for a long term relationship to thrive, especially in the bedroom. Men would like this too, but they don’t necessarily need it to continue a sexual relationship.
Unfortunately in many (perhaps most) relationships women do feel that a disproportionate share of household and childcare duties fall on them, which erodes at those core foundations of a healthy long term relationship.
Is it all on men to work this out? No. But if they want to take an active approach to maintaining the health of their relationship, meeting their partners emotional needs has the highest likelihood is doing that and keeping the bedroom alive.
Women like to be physically intimate when they feel safe, understood and appreciated. Men should ask for the same in their partners even if we’re conditioned not to ‘need’ all of that in the same way.
I think your point about differing needs is really the core of all of the friction. At least when we’re not talking about the worthless kind of husband demanding shit and not actually being present etc.
I can only speak for myself, but the presence or lack of physical intimacy has a massive effect on whether or not I feel: valued, appreciated, or desired in a relationship. Lack makes me start thinking things like “Am I your partner, or just the providertm? Do you actually want me around when I’m not providing value, doing things for you? Is this a job or a relationship? Are you no longer attracted to me? Do you even really want to be near me, spend time with me?”
And note I keep using the phrase “physical intimacy”. I’m not a prude, if I meant sex I’d say it directly. That’s part, but not all of it.
When we potato on the couch, has it literally been months since my partner sat next to or leaned on me? Are they literally sitting on the opposite side, as far as they can possibly get away? Ok, is it a “I don’t feel safe” thing? No, they’ll sit with me when I ask, or when I go to them, but never of their own accord.
Stuff like that builds up over time, and personally, when I talk about stuff like this I’m talking patterns of behaviour over years, not “wah wah I couldn’t get the nookie when she was trying to figure out how to get a newborn to sleep through the night”.
So it’s infuriating when the horde comes out to insist the only reason there could possibly be problems is if the guy is a shitpile, and that there’s always layers upon layers for why it’s never okay for a man to feel anything about a lack of physical intimacy. For fucks sake I do my part, I do everything I can to meet her emotional and other needs. Am I not allowed to feel like I’m being treated as a roommate rather than a partner? Am I not allowed to feel like I’m not desired? What about my own emotional needs? No, because so many shitpile men exist I guess.
I get where you’re coming from and I’ve personally gone through many of the feelings you’re describing. As men we sometimes feel that (physical) intimacy is how our partners communicate to us our ‘value’ in a way. Some of that is toxic cultural norms but there is also just fundamental differences in how intimacy is perceived between men and women in long term relationships.
As you’ve aptly stated, the difference is men often feel that intimacy is part of how they are made to feel appreciated and valued while, in my experience, women need to feel validated, appreciated and valued emotionally as the soil in which a persistent desire for physical intimacy grows.
I am by no means diminishing the experience of men or trying to say its all on them. I have literally posed the questions that youve asked in past relationships and while they understood where I was coming from it never fixed the rift. Only after I took the initiave to take interest in and prioritize their emotional security and trust in me did the dynamic change from a diminishing interest in intimacy and rare or less frequent initiation to the opposite of that.
I’m just speaking on my own experience, particularly regarding long term relationships. Hopefully it’s helpful to someone out there.
I wish I could be that picky lol, if I had to feel safe, understood, and appreciated I’d still be a virgin lmao. If I ever told a woman “no I want to feel safe, understood, and appreciated” I’d be called an incel. At best she’d get the ick and ghost me, at the most generous interpretation because “if I need that from her how am I going to provide it to her” (but I honestly think it’s because desiring “safety and understanding” isn’t “manly” and “appreciation” “what do you mean…patriarchy…women are the ones who aren’t appreciated…yadda yadda.” Sort of the same deal as the classic “I want a sensitive man who cries” and then the second you do she loses any semblance of respect for you as a person.)
Holy shit, you all were crying and downvoting en masse because “we are treating all men the same”.
What the fuck is this?
Women aren’t capable of caring for and making their partners safe and appreciated??
Wow. Wow wow wow.
Women aren’t capable of caring for and making their partners safe and appreciated??
Says the one assuming all intimacy issues are caused by male failure lmao. Wow your ass on outta here with that shit, “generalizations for me but not for thee.” What’s the line again, “If it doesn’t apply to you I wasn’t talking about you?”
The assumption in here is that all intimacy issues are caused by women refusing to give sex to men.
Almost like giving birth and raising a baby is an all-hands-on-deck situation and sex isn’t as much of an immediate need like sleep and eating and surviving are during that time.
I hear what you’re saying but I’d say that not all women are like that and these conversations are really meant for someone you’re prepared to have a deep commitment with, not necessarily early on in a relationship. There are a ton of toxic attachment patterns and cultural norms in our society that are challenging to navigate but these tend to matter less as a relationship evolves into a long term one.
Is affection a thing that even exists?
damn dude, you ok?
I’m fine. What’s wrong with the rest of you? When’s the last time you saw actual people do anything other than devolve into a who hates whom the most contest? Because I’m drawing a complete blank.
That really depends. My wife cuddled me pretty heavily a lot of the weekend, and grabbed me while I was trying to get up and go to work, but for other people it was Friday. I went out to a bar and saw people being affectionate, both romantically and platonically. In fact “who hates whom contests” are something I see from time to time among people I know IRL, but it’s more of an every other month or so thing, not the default social interaction.
That probably happens somewhere not on the Internet
No. So stop wishing for it and do something productive.
If that’s your perspective, is anyone ever responsible for anything? Or is it all just genetics and hormones
What stupid take.
If your hormones tell you to punch someone you should be reasonable enough not to do it.
If your hormones make you not horny, you shouldn’t force yourself to have sex.
Those are two totally different things.
What stupid take.
If your hormones tell you to punch someone you should be reasonable enough not to do it.
Can you name the punching hormone for me? My degree is in a more technical field, so I was under the impression that they regulated tissues and organs.
Testosterone?
One of the many hormones that both sexes produce?
Guess that explains why the incidence of physical abuce, and divorce, is highest in lesbian couples.
Wait, for real?
It isn’t cis hetero men?
I definitely wouldn’t have expected that one, but the social sciences are some of the farthest things from my training.
Adrenaline.
Good try but also wrong. Testosterone is an anabolic that regulates muscle growth mood and other things.
I have seen nothing scientific to indicate that there is a punching mechanism associated with it.
How is it supposed to tell you to punch besides mood?
So it’s his fault or it’s not her fault?
A dude I used to work with left his wife to deal with the newborn.
It was so bad between dayshifts that he used to leave the house at 2am and just sit in a motorway service station with a coffee for a few hours just to get some peace before coming to work.
If I tried that, my other half would stab me in the face.
I got 3 months paid paternity leave through a state program. A coworker who had a kid that same month chose to not use the state program and take 2 PTO days instead. I talked to him before hand and told him about the program but he said something like “I wouldn’t be much help, she’s done it twice already so she has it handled”. It was very evident how his wife felt about him at the Christmas party that year.
She sought out my wife, who she knew had a kid recently too and my wife brought up how nice it was to have me home for those first few months and somehow the state program came up in the conversation. She then booked it over to me and asked me about it, not knowing what was going on or thinking much about it, I told her about it and that I can’t believe coworker didn’t do it. Then all hell broke loose. This tiny little lady dragged out my 6 foot heavy set coworker by the ear, calling him every name in the book. She made him use all his PTO days and went to spend new years somewhere warm. He bitched about how hard it was taking care of 3 kids on his own for weeks.
‘Funny’ enough all the guys in the office thought she was being ridiculous but all the women were praising her.
Bruh if I had the choice between working, or raising My baby full time for the same pay, I’d pick the baby. And I hate babies! They’re annoying and needy, that’s why I prefer adoption. But it’s a baby, it deserves to be looked after. And it’s a better feeling to create a person than making the boss rich.
I think if a face stabbing is the result of doing something like that you have more serious problems…
I mean it’s obviously hyperbole, but as a pregnant woman with a toddler, I’d be absolutely livid to learn my husband was taking hours long coffee breaks while leaving the shared work of child rearing (specifically newborn care) to me alone.
Sleep deprivation will absolutely make you a crazy person, and this dude is just using this torture tactic on her out of laziness and selfishness.
Being livid is one thing, stabbing someone is an entirely different story… Let’s just hope it’s actually hyperbole.
